Monday, October 31, 2011

31 Days of Femininity: Being Feminine In Public

We have covered a lot of different topics concerning femininity this past month! I've really enjoyed doing the series, but I have to admit I'm really looking forward to not blogging *every* single day in November. :) I have a lot of exciting giveaways and a fun new topic planned for November, so stay tuned!

I wanted to wrap up the series by talking about being feminine in public. It can be easy to learn how to be feminine at home, but sometimes it's harder to apply these principles when we are out and about.

There have been many times I have been blessed by seeing a woman in a store who, just by her demeanor and appearance, instantly strikes me as being a feminine woman. It encourages me and uplifts my sometimes draining shopping trips to see another woman striving to be who she is called by God to be.

I've realized that at times it is hard for me to be feminine when I am out. Going shopping with four young children can be exhausting, and I have to put on a strong mental attitude before I go out! Plus, I prepare myself for all the comments that come my way - "Are these all yours?"  "My, you must have your hands full!"  "You are expecting again? Oh my!" and the list could go on. There have been times an older gentleman has offered to help me load up my groceries, put away my cart, etc. and while I have certainly accepted these offers many times, I have been known to refuse the help also and tell him I am just fine. During those moments I recognize that I don't have a feminine attitude, but more of a feminist attitude. I'm trying to prove that I have it all together and I don't need any help. I personally think that's the wrong attitude to have. If a gentleman is trying to help you out of the kindness of his heart, let him be that manly gentleman and accept his help! Obviously you need to be discerning in today's world and make sure that the help you are accepting is just from a gallant knight, and he does not have any other motives in mind. I hate to even mention that, but it is sadly the world we live in today.

It is also perfectly acceptable to let a gentleman open a door for you, and you graciously accept his gesture of gallant manhood. I notice that I get the door opened for me far more when I am in skirts than the few times I have gone out in pants. Just a little observation of mine....

Being feminine in public is a mindset. It is a determination before you step out your door in the morning that you are going to put on a meek and quiet spirit and try to witness to others about the Lord through your example. This brings to mind the following quote. Not that words do not matter, for they certain do; but sometimes...

We might very well say that we believe in being feminine, and we might say we are a follower of the Lord, but our actions speak louder than words. How we behave in public clearly shows what kind of person we are. I have deeply regretted the times I have been in public and spoken crossly to my children when I was tired, only to look up and see someone watching me. That was my only opportunity to show them that I do enjoy being a mother to a larger than normal family, but I wasn't showing it at that moment. And of course I regret it because I'm not showing my child that attitude of a meek spirit in their mother.

As I close this series out, I would just exhort you to continue to display Godly femininity no matter where you are, whether it is in your home with your children, spending time with your husband, or out in public.

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At October 31, 2011 at 9:14 AM , Blogger Heather said...

I have thoroughly enjoyed this series & have learned a lot! Thank you!! :)

At October 31, 2011 at 10:17 AM , Blogger Jennifer said...

Last night we were out as a family. We stopped at the gas station for my husband to put gas in the car. While we were parked, a car full of "girls" pulled up beside us. These were young girls, maybe 17 years old. They were all 3 out in their pajamas, they were using foul language that I wouldn't want to hear coming out of a man's mouth, much less out of a young girl's mouth, and they were hitting each other, the way you might see teenage boys doing. I was very disappointed that my 4 year old son witnessed their behavior. I don't want him ever believing that a young lady should act that way. And I hope that my husband and I will set good examples for him so that he will be more and expect more from the young lady he chooses for his wife in the future.

At October 31, 2011 at 12:22 PM , Anonymous Jacki M. said...

Love this blog! I have noticed that as my dress and demeanor has has our girls. A good reminder that they see everything that we do (whether we think they do or not).

Keep up the awesome work. God Bless.

At October 31, 2011 at 8:35 PM , Anonymous Angela said...

Hello Caroline,

Thank you for this series, it has been interesting to read. As you look to November, I do hope you will continue your courtship story - I was particularly enjoying reading that.


At October 31, 2011 at 10:42 PM , Blogger Lisa said...

Boy, I feel convicted after reading this, because I have lost my temper with my children in public and have scolded them. I feel so badly afterwards! I need to pray for God's Grace to come into my mother's heart and teach me different ways to get discipline across to my kiddos.

Thank you so much for all of these posts! They are a wonderful reminder of what we are called to be as Christian wives and mothers. They have truly been inspiring!

Many blessings,

At November 1, 2011 at 1:28 PM , Blogger Hannah Irene said...

What a great quote by Ralph Waldo Emerson! Our actions certainly do speaker louder than words. We can talk about being Christians all day long but if our actions don't match up, there's little meaning behind them.

I have also noticed the difference between how I'm treated when I'm wearing pants versus skirts! Men are far more likely to be gentlemanly and treat me like a lady when I am in a skirt. It's amazing!

Thank-you for sharing and for the encouragement to be the women God made us to be.


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